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Teen Titans: The 10 Most Pathetic Villains In Their Rogues Gallery, Ranked

The Teen Titans are one of the most popular teams in comic book history. Showcasing the young heroes who were normally secondary characters in their own books was a hit among young fans, as they could have an easier time identifying with the young, rebellious vigilantes as opposed to the larger than life adult members of the Justice League.

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Of course, the teens wouldn’t be able to fight powerhouses like Darkseid or Brainiac, but they managed to rack up a pretty impressive rogues gallery for kids who are used to just following the instructions of their mentors no matter what. In fact, big time DC supervillains such as Deathstroke actually began within the pages of Teen Titans. However, the Titans are still kids, and there are definitely some villains that aren’t important enough for the League to team up against. These wannabes end up going against the Titans, and failing over and over again – 10 of which have been featured here because of how pitiable they are.

10 Doctor Light (Pre-Identity Crisis)

Doctor Light is one of the Teen Titans‘ most consistent villains. He started off trying to be a Justice League villain but was easily beaten by them, so he went after their sidekicks instead. He is the founder of the Fearsome Five and probably considers himself the Titans’ greatest enemy. He was mainly seen as a joke of a villain until the events of Identity Crisis.

It was revealed that Light had raped Sue Dibney, the wife of Elongated Man, so the League had Zatanna perform a magical lobotomy on him. This explains why he was always such a mediocre villain and easily taken down by the Titans. When his mind is restored, he turns out to be a major threat but it’s still hard for fans take this joke villain seriously, despite and in spite of his villainous highlight being such a heinous crime.

9 Calculator

It’s easy to see what DC was going for with the name “Calculator,” but it’s hard to take a villain seriously with the name of a school supply item. Calculator was originally mostly featured in one-shots of Detective Comics, stealing objects and then easily being defeated.

He created a button that somehow analyzes a fight and lets him win no matter what, which doesn’t really make sense given his codename but whatever. He eventually got a modern update as the opposite of Barbara Gordon’s Oracle, as he became a source of information for the entire criminal underground-for the right price, of course.

8 Andre Le Blanc

Andre Le Blanc calls himself the “world’s greatest jewel thief,” yet he spent most of his time time annoying a minor hero by the name of Red Star. Apparently, Red Star was unable to handle him, so the Teen Titans were called in to help defeat the thief.

Probably the most arrogant supervillain ever, he bragged of his crimes before committing them, allowing the Titans to find him and take him down before anything even happened. Andre Le Blanc’s only claim to fame is that villain Bomb Voyage at the very beginning of Disney’s The Incredibles is actually a spoof of him.

7 Plasmus

Mining for radioactive radium, as one naturally does, Otto Von Furth was exposed to the radiation and the tampering of a villain named General Zahl left him in a blob-like state. Basically, he’s the lamest possible lovechild of Parasite and Clayface.

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At best, Plasmus is a minor villain with plasmic powers that joined the Brotherhood of Evil and fought the Teen Titans. He appears in the animated series as more of a tragic, Jekyll/Hyde type character, which is arguably an upgrade from his original origins.

6 Cinderblock

Cinderblock is actually a pretty unique character with his introduction. Similar to Harley Quinn and Mercy Graves, Cinderblock was an original character created for the animated series that made his way into the comics.

He is a humanoid concrete monster (duh) often seen working for Deathstroke in the animated series. In the comics he gains the power to reform himself, and is defeated by his head being thrown into the San Francisco Bay.

5 Red Panzer

Here’s a tip for all aspiring comic book creators: giving a supervillain a Nazi background is an extremely easy way to get an audience to root against him, but slapping a swastika on his forehead might is just overkill. Not only did Red Panzer serve as a villain to Wonder Woman for the longest time, but THREE people after him took on the name themselves and became supervillains.

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The third Red Panzer has the most ridiculous origin story, where he becomes a villain after finding out he’s 1/4th African American. Yes, really. Being a Nazi villain is bad enough, but being a lame Nazi villain is worse. He primarily works with the supervillain group Tartarus, and is an enemy of Donna Troy.

4 The Puppeteer

Here’s a villain so dumb that would be a crime to not include him on a list of the lamest supervillains in all of comics history. Originally a Green Lantern villain, Puppeteer was so humiliated by his defeat that he turned his attention to the Teen Titans. He tried starting a new life working for a company called Dayton Industries, where he stole the new material they created called Promethium.

Using this, he created robot puppets that fought the Titans and managed to control some of them. However, Raven was eventually able to break free of the hypnosis, defeat the villain, and rescue her teammates. He was so bad at his job that he was actually supposed to be executed by H.I.V.E. for failing, but he managed to escape.

3 Mad Mod

Mad Mod was actually one of the first villains to fight the Teen Titans, and that’s about the only thing noteworthy about him. He has no superpowers and is nothing more than a fashion designer who uses his clothes to smuggle things. His main scheme was to steal the scepter of the Queen of Britain, but was stopped by the Titans.

He got an upgrade in the animated series as a combination of Austin Powers and Mysterio who used technology to trick and taunt the Titans as they desperately tried to escape his mindgames and traps. It also helps that he was voiced by none other than Malcolm McDowell.

2 Monsiuer Mallah & The Brain

Monsieur Mallah and Brain aren’t actually that bad. It may be difficult to take them seriously but their relationship is unique and actually kind of cute. Mallah is basically Gorilla Grodd without the temper or mental powers, but working with Brain, he’s actually able to hold their own against the Titans. Brain is just what the name says: a brain.

Who did the Brain belong to? Its never given a name, but they were a scientist who worked with Niles Caulder, experimenting on animals and creating hyper intelligent creatures, which is how Mallah came into the world. The two are actually the perfect combination of Brains and Brawn, but it’s impossible not to smirk at the sight of a beret-wearing gorilla with a French accent who’s lovingly carrying a brain in a metal tube.

1 Ding Dong Daddy

What should be the gimmick for a villain for the next generation of DC superheroes? A hot rod driver, of course! Surely the hot rod must be something on the levels of the Batmobile, otherwise he can’t be an actual threat to the Titans, right? Nope. It’s just a hot rod. Even better, this hot rod-loving baddie fit better in some derivative ’80s-era Saturday morning edutatinment cartoon, not a comic about DC’s most beloved teenage heroes.

The President’s Commission on Education noticed a rise in a small town’s number of high school dropouts, so they asked the Titans for help. After going undercover, the team discovered the dropouts were being hired by Ding Dong Daddy, the owner of a hot rod shop, to commit crimes. The Titans easily stopped him, but he returned in a later issue and stole the Arrowcar from Speedy because of course he did. He also appeared in the cartoon, where he was only slightly less lamer than he originally was.

NEXT: Every Animated Titans Team: Which Is The Best?

The Teen Titans have fought their fair share of worthy foes, but many others are just downright pathetic

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